ShopDreamUp AI ArtDreamUp
Deviation Actions
Literature Text
"you bet your sweet ass!"
*bets ass*
*wins a million butts*
nice
If its inaccessible to the poor it’s neither radical nor revolutionary
“You can tell how dangerous a person is by the way they hold their anger inside themselves quietly.”
May you write 1,500 words with ease. May your characters be lively and not cardboard. May you need little editing. May your muse visit you as soon as you sit. May the Internet not distract you much. May your phone lie dormant while you write.
I can tell myself all day, “be heartless, fuck em” but in all reality, I have a big ass heart, and can’t treat people bad, that’s just not me.
the gothest sentence in existence: “Hi Vampire.” I said flirtily as I started to sob.
Don’t worry about those who talk behind your back, they’re behind you for a reason.
Artist starter pack
notebook paper to draw on, pencil to draw with, trashcan to throw the majority of your drawings away, and tissues to cry with.
a NSFW blog but instead of porn it’s just pictures of unsafe work practices like standing on chairs and using staplers improperly.
mom can i borrow money to buy you a present
In roleplay land we don’t say I love you, we share painful headcanons and send eight thousand meme responses a day and I think that’s beautiful.
#Oh god that would be aweful!! #LETS DO IT
does anyone else have days where they just get stressed out from just being spoken to
like you jsut come out of your room and someone could say something totally nice and well meaning to you and you can’t help but feel like “aaaahHH LEAVE ME ALONE”
The surging oil finally drops in pressure enough for you to get up to the signal fire. There's a steady burble of crude oil underneath the pyre, and flammable fumes shimmer above it. You bang a couple of rocks together until you get the attention of a passing interstellar starship, which lights the pyre for you with its photon beam. Success!
This is a ghost who picked up a sheet off of one of the pieces of furniture in here, making it a very convincing ghost in a very unconvincing ghost costume.
You squat down and cluck your tongue cheerfully at the turtle until it waddles over to see what's wrong with you.
Used in the ancient native ritual "Let's Sell Some Ugly Crap To Tourists".
Be the kind of person people write books about
“It’s always surprising to me how many young women think they have to be perfect. I rarely meet a young man who doesn’t think he already is.”
At 17, I was a depressed teenager who self harmed and wondered about just how painful it could possibly be to end my life. Right now, I’m laying on the couch, and I can hear my husband reading our four year old a bedtime story using silly voices.
Life gets better. Make sure you’re there to see it.
“We blame society, but we are society.”
“It is a mark of maturity when someone hurts you, and you try to understand them.”
Mistakes are proof that you’re trying.
Things that need to stop: autism only being represented as white eight-year old boys who know a lot about trains and airplanes.
Today I was talking to my dad and I referred to myself as his son(I’m genderfluid btw) and he said “Today’s a Son day huh?”And I was like “yeah”And he was like “huh, I thought today was a Saturday, not a Sunday” And I just laughed for like 5 minutes
Diversity only makes dads stronger. More powerful. the dad jokes are evolving
"you can’t hate someone for being rude to your friend-"
excuse fucking me. my friends are the best thing that have ever happened to me. don’t expect me to sit around and watch as some asshole disrespect them and expects me to still like them.
I bet our entire universe is in a tiny glass jar placed neatly on a shelf in some alien child’s room as a science project he got a C on.
How I met your father: So basically I was in a barn and then he walks in, and obviously, the first thing I do is stab him. It didn’t work lol and now we’re married.
if artistic people are forced to take years of math and science then why don’t sciencey people have to take art and music classes
And if you’re “bad” at art and music, then “it’s okay, not everyone has an aptitude for those kinds of things” but if you’re bad at math and science, then “you’re not smart/you’re not trying hard enough”
"Would you rather crash on a friend’s couch or the freeway?" would be a good campaign slogan against drinking and driving.
you ever thought that maybe the reason girls say they’re fine when they’re not, or they’re not mad when they are, is because the second they show any semblance of emotion they’re written off as hysterical bitches that are probably on their period?
It always gets me when MRAs bring up the draft as an example of discrimination against men. Yes, it’s true that no woman in America has ever been subject to conscription in times of war; however, being that the most recent draft was in 1973, most likely neither have you. If you get to drag up stuff that happened before you were born, so does everybody else - and I’m pretty sure the ladies are going to win that particular game of misery poker.
I think we should start putting less pressure on gay people to ‘come out’ and more pressure on straight people to stop assuming everyone’s sexuality is fucking straight
I met a couple Australians this weekend and they introduced me to what is possibly the greatest phrase in the English language. Apparently, a common response to a wide variety of questions is “I’m not here to fuck spiders”. It means “I’m already doing that” or “Obviously, yeah”. So like, example usage:
At the bar with a friend.
Friend: do you want to get a beer?
Me: well, I’m not here to fuck spiders.
why are girls expected to go through an experimental lesbian phase but u never hear about dudes goin gay for a while whats up w/ that
----cause that would be realllllly weird, unlike girls doing it. guys actually like when girls do it.
do me a favor and staple all your fingertips together
headphones with antlers: The ultimate in “don’t talk to me” technology because if people keep trying to talk to you, you can just spear them in the eye.
You know those snake creature things all over Sen’s Fortress that shoot lightning at you? I was recently informed that they’re called Serpent Mages. They had the opportunity to name them Lizard Wizards and they didn’t take it. Smh…
let's talk about the physical affects of chronic anxiety because they're hardly ever acknowledged upset stomach and vomiting
ulcers
muscle aches
chronic fatigue
hormonal problems
irregular menstrual cycles
insomnia
infections
lowered immune system
migraines
shortness of breath
dizziness
heart palpitations
teeth-grinding
rashes
it is a lot more than just “feeling anxious “
The villain has the hero at gunpoint. Everything seems lost. Then the hero has an amazing idea: Make them talk. So the hero says “Now since I am as good as dead, tell me: Why are you doing this?”
The villain smiles and shoots him. Plot twist: the villain is fucking smart
I don’t know why anyone would assume I have any authority to comment on that.
The pilgrims were American colonists who escaped persecution in England in order to pursue the dream of persecuting people themselves.
the only ship i need is a scholarship can i get a hallelujah
“Large hair monster intrudes loving family dinner.”
“Afro Princess shows off her magnificent oven mitts.”
Me:*tries to go to bed at a reasonable time*
Me:ah yes
Me:4am
Me
erfect
Reblog if you dont shave your legs everyday. I just want everyone to see how unrealistic some expectations are.
--who the fuck shaves their legs everyday?
-----It’s winter. I need protection from the elements.
Remember that reddit post that was going around several months ago about the dude who wanted an open relationship with his girlfriend because he wanted to date “hotter” women than his fat girlfriend but then when she agreed she was dating tons of hot guys and he couldn’t get a single woman to date him so he wanted to close the relationship because he thought it was unfair?
Sometimes I think about that and it gives me life.
bae:tell me your wildest fantasy
me:i'm financially stable in a job that i love with great opportunities for career advancement. i live in a modest home with a good sized yard and a fence for my dogs, there are hardly any problems with the home, but sometimes the garbage disposal clogs. the fridge and pantry are never empty and when they're getting low, i can go to the grocery store at my leisure. my pre-owned car never makes funny noises and when it does, i have the money to take it to the mechanic. i am in good health and most days, i have the energy to carry out my daily tasks and do some things i enjoy as well.
15 different kinds of love
Infatuation- loving feelings towards a love object that are largely based upon fantasy and idealization (instead of experience). Often when partners get to know each other, infatuation diminishes.
Romantic Love- An abiding love for a partner with whom you feel passion, attraction, caring and respect.
Eros- a passionate love usually involving sexual feelings for a love interest.
Companionate Love- feelings of warmth towards a friend with whom you love to spend time
Unconditional Love- A type of affection and caring that is so strong that you feel it consistently, regardless of what that other person does
Conditional Love- A love that requires specific action or conditions in order to be maintained. For example, at its extreme, a parent who gives very conditional love would only love his child when he gets straight A’s, becomes a surgeon and has two children. The love is based on outside conditions and when they do not occur, the love is withdrawn.
Puppy Love- A childish, innocent temporary crush on someone that you don’t know well.
Maternal Love- This term usually connotes love that is nurturing, accepting and protective. In actuality this love can also be given by a father etc.
Paternal Love- This term connotes love that involves guidance and some authority. Paternal love usually prepares a child to be ready for the outside world. Again, in reality this type of love is not gender specific.
Soulmate Love- This type of love is described as a love that has survived multiple life times. Not everyone believes in this concept.
Spiritual/Divine Love- This type of love recognizes the Divine light in everyone and everything. Love is given to everyone as an act of loving God.
Love of your country or patriotism- This is love for the place you live or the place that were born. It is a type of loyalty and a special feeling of belonging that you attribute to that specific geographic location.
Self-Love- This is a positive feeling that you have about who you are and what you deserve. It often is expressed by treating yourself well, respecting yourself, wanting yourself to be happy and expecting others to respect you too.
Brotherly Love- This term connotes having a feeling of love for your neighbor, because all humanity is considered to be part of a larger family of human beings.
Tough Love- This term is used to describe a love that is expressed by setting boundaries for the good of the other person. So for example, a parent may send their teenager to rehab if he is drug addicted, even if he does not want to go. They feel that this is an act of love because it stems from a desire for their son’s ultimate good and happiness.
Women:Why do men spit in public?
Men:Where ELSE should we spit? On you??? Do you want us to spit on YOU!?! Alright, FINE.
Women:A teenage girls bra strap shouldn't be a reason to send her home.
Men
kay. Okay, alright. Alright, okay, okay. Well why don't I just PULL MY DICK OUT IN CLASS THEN!?!?
Women:A person should have the right to an abortion.
Menhhhhh women want abortions! Well men should be able to rape them, that seems like the logical equivalent of this situation.
Women:Women need to defend themselves from violent men.
Menh, what, you can hit me but I can't hit you!? why CAN'T I hit you? WHEN can I hit you??? Tell me when I can hit you, please. I want to know. I need to know.
Women:Men overreact a lot.
Men:WHOA. Why would you go there? Why do you generalize all men like that? I feel so attacked. This is so hurtful.
Men:This is why no one likes feminists.
I love this story because this guy in the early 1800’s had so many great childhood memories of this tree and wanted to make sure it was protected no matter what. So he deeded the ownership of the tree to itself and everyone just went with it.
Then in 1942 this intense windstorm came and knocked the tree over. And people were bummed. But someone had saved an acorn from the original tree, so they planted that and now Son of the Tree That Owns Itself is over 50 feet tall.
And since this new tree is technically the offspring of the original tree it’s considered to have legally inherited the plot of land it’s inhabiting.
Two generations of trees owning land is amazing and if you don’t think this is the coolest thing get right out of my face.
how dare this younger generation enjoy casual hookups and temporary dating…back in my day we got married to our first crushes when we were 18 and ended up unhappy by the time we were 40
like when an ugly nigga tell you you cute you gotta wonder if you ugly and that an ugly nigga think you within his ugly ass league
What if the cure for cancer is trapped inside the mind of someone who can’t afford an education?
Why is body hair only unhygienic when it’s on a woman’s body?
do you ever talk to your parents about feminist or racism issues and realize how sexist and racist they really are?
let’s bring back the term “cats” when referring to a group of people (i.e. “see you cats later”)
pros:
it’s gender neutral
you get the chance to look like a cool jazz musician
you can compare all your friends to cats (always good)
cons:
????
all i really want from my life is a legitimate reason to pin a bunch of photos and newspaper fragments on a huge cork board and connect them with long strings of yarn
Stupidest things ive ever heard on the internet so far:
"boobs were made for men not for feeding babies!!!!!!!!!! stop using boobs for anything other than pleasing us!!!"
"How dare babies pass though the vagina during birth, don’t they know vaginas are for a men’s penis"
Straight people don’t get to destermine what homophobia is.
Men don’t get to determine what women consider harassment.
White people don’t get to determine what racisim is like for people of color.
the snoot advanced
get learned how to make stuff more deader.
Straight people have been stealing from the gay community for ages now. Especially from the black gay/trans community.
“Grade 1
Students in Grade 1 will be taught the proper names for body parts – something child-abuse investigators have long urged.
They will also learn how to recognize non-verbal signals, such as facial expressions and tone of voice, to better communicate with others.
Grade 2
In Grade 2, students will learn about bodily changes and development, verbal and physical violence, and the concept that “no means no.”
Grades 3-4
Grade 3 students will learn about same-sex relationships, while the physical, emotional and social impacts of puberty will move from Grade 5 to Grade 4.
Grades 5-6
In Grade 5, students will continue learning about puberty, including menstruation and spermatogenesis, and how these processes relate to reproduction.
Students in Grade 6 will learn about masturbation and “gender expression.” They will also be educated on how to build healthy relationships and consent.
Grades 7-8
In Grades 7-8, students will learn about the dangers of “sexting.”
They will also discuss contraception, anal and oral sex, and ways to prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections.
Grades 9-10
Teaching materials on mental health, previously relegated to older grades, will be introduced in Grade 9. Grade 9 students will also explore gender identity, sexual orientation and the resources available for support.
In Grade 10, students will continue to learn what factors influence sexual decision-making, including personal values, peer and family expectations, and media messages.
Under the current sex education program, Grades 9 and 10 students focus on promoting healthy sexuality, preventing sexually transmitted infections, and identifying the stages of sexuality.
Grades 11-12
Similarly to the existing program, students in Grades 11 and 12 will focus on how to use decision-making skills to create healthy relationships.
They will also learn about reducing the stigma around mental illness, and taking proactive health measures.”
---Do you understand how fantastic this is? Sex Ed has not been changed since the time that I was born and now we’re going to be have education on gender identities, sexual orientations are going to be taught from a young age on the importance of consent and the enforcement of how “no is no”. Older students are going to be learning about mental health and how to reduce the stigma around it. This is not the training of “abstinence is key”. Take note America
I just realized the climax of the Lion King is kind of hilarious.
Because it came down to a showdown fight between Scar and Simba. And here’s something great about them: they are the weakest little shits.
Scar was this skinny twig of a lion who probably only got the 11th+ portion of any kill because nobody liked him, and the only way he could one-up anyone was through trickery, and/or by softening them up with a wildebeest herd.
Simba grew up without ever having to chase his prey or work particularly hard because he lived on a diet of insects and nothing else. Nala could kick his ass because she was a goddamn proper hunter.
So the final battle was the equivalent to a pasty-faced metrosexual teen slap-fighting a starving 60-year old
Convo between my 7 year-old students today
Josie:I have a new crusshhhhh
Matt:Me too! On a boy!
Pearl:You're a boy with a crush on a boy?
Matt:Yeah he's really cute.
Pearlh.
(pause for a bit)
Matt
oys can like boys. I just can't marry him because boys can't marry boys.
Me:Yeah they can. You can marry whoever you want.
Matt:Really?
Josie:YEAH my tia has a wife so now I have a titi and a auntie.
Mattkay. Then maybe I'll marry him.
Dave
from across the room) No you can't you're seven.
(Age was apparently the only foreseeable problem anyone of my elementary schoolers could see with gay marriage.)
Learn to take a compliment?
How about learn to give a compliment.
Because street harassment is not a compliment.
like it’s not “whoops I’m PREGNANT AGAIN tee hee time for an abortion!!”
nobody fuckin does that. Nobody .
it’s more along the lines of do you want an abortion or do you want to die?
do you want an abortion or do you want to watch your baby die after a week?
do you want an abortion or do you want your life to fall apart around you because of a child you are either unable or unfit to support?
do you want to give up a fetus or a living, breathing baby you could potentially wreck your body and threaten your life for?
“The men in Hollywood event is every day—it’s called Hollywood. Fifty-one percent of the population should not have to have to schedule a special event to celebrate the fact that in an art that tells the story of what it means to be human and alive, we get to play a part.
My husband and I do kind of the same job — a little bit. Not long ago we both had one of those magical days which we call a junket, where we both attended these lovely events where people come in every four minutes and they ask the same questions over and over again, you know the drill. We got home at night and we compared notes.
And I told him every single person who interviewed me, I mean every single one, and this is true of the red carpet here tonight, Elle, asked me, ‘How do you balance work and family?’ and he said the only thing that people asked him repeatedly was about the tits on the ‘Blurred Lines’ girl [Emily Ratajkowski his co-star in Gone Girl].
As for work-life balance, he said no one asked him about it that day. As a matter of fact, no one had ever asked him about it. And we do share the same family. Isn’t it time to kinda change that conversation?”
“"Get a better job," they said.
Suddenly, every custodian everywhere quits their job and gets a better one. Now, upon entering public restrooms, everyone is handed a spray bottle and toilet brush, because now they have to scrub their own shit out of that public porcelain throne. Women’s restrooms come complete with plastic bags, because they have to bring their soiled period products home with them and dispose of them at home, because there is no more public waste removal.
"Get a better job," they said.
All fast food employees quit and find a “better job”. No more fast food places! There also aren’t any restaurants. Better learn to cook your own shitty garbage burgers. You have only yourself to yell at if you forget the cheese.
"Get a better job," they said.
Retail stores no longer have any employees. All shopping must be done online, but you have to drive out and pick up the supplies yourself because the Fedex people quit and got better jobs, too.
"Just get a better job," they said!
You now have to grow and make every single thing you ever consume for the rest of your life, because no one wants to do it for you at $7 an hour.
Fuck you.”
I belong somewhere tropical. I am so tired of snow, farmlands, and cold weather. I want beaches and palms…
person:i'm super socially awkward cuz i crush on a fictional character
meh yeah who?
person:this vampire assassin badboy with a motorbike
me:i'm crushing on a fictional Valkyrie who isn't even a Valkyrie but an actor who is stuck on a deserted island and thinks she is still on stage and she only eats meat and is surrounded by shitty pun monsters
person:yeah but he has a motorbike
me:yeah but she has a sweetass helmet
apparently it costs $241,000 to raise a kid
"Homophobia: The fear that another man will treat you like you treat women."
When I say “boys are dumb” what I really mean is “boys have been raised in a patriarchal society that forces them into an incorrect and problematic view of masculinity that not only forces them to strip away valuable virtues from themselves, like patience and gentleness, but also forces them to view and treat women in unhealthy ways that devalues women as people and makes them into objects purely for a man’s benefit”
but it’s a lot faster to say “boys are dumb”
((WHICH GODDESS IS KNOWN FOR BEING THE MOST BEAUTIFUL?)))
DONT ASK ME THIS, THIS IS HOW THE TROJAN WAR STARTED, I DONT WANT THIS MAN!!!!!!
And then I’m just like, “DAMMIT, DID YOU LEARN NOTHING FROM PARIS? YOU ARE AN EMBARRASSMENT, AND NOW ALL THE TROJANS ARE DEAD. I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY.”
---If you are ever actually in this situation, pro-tip: name Persephone. Half the goddesses will be too surprised to smite you immediately and while Hades won’t do you any favors he may at least high-five you while your on your way down.
----Another tip: name Mesperyian. Not only will you shock everyone, including her (since Aphrodite was a jealous ho who burnt half her face off), but you’ll win Hades’ favour. As his most beloved daughter, anything that praises her will make you a kind human to her, an okay human to him, and a genuinely good person to anyone else.
I love how all of this advice leads to “please Hades at all costs.”
no1 cares if ur vegan or a vegetarian what we’re annoyed with is that you insist that ur better than us and that we’re satan or something because we eat meat omfg
----You’re supporting an industry that condones the murder and abuse of billions of lives. You’re not Satan, you’re God. Satan kills far fewer people.
did you just call me god?
If martin luther king were still alive, then his granddaughter would have recently celebrated her 6th birthday.
Not great-granddaughter, just granddaughter. think about how little time ago the civil rights movement actually happened, and understand that there is still much work to be done for equality.
It's amazing to me how sick everyone is of talking about ladies, considering how rare it is for us to talk about actual ladies. I mean, specific people who happen to be ladies, rather than the abstract, intangible concept of "ladies" and lady-ness. "Ladies," we'll say, and then sit back and sip at our cappuccino/Scotch/Shirley Temple. "They sure are that thing they be. I wonder if it's possible for them to be funny or do math." Meanwhile, in the background, actual ladies with body-hair and smelly armpits and bad tempers are inventing computers and punk rock and, like, pies too probably (now I'm just listing my favorite things). And we were too busy nursing our Shirley Temples to even notice.
Thirty years before Charles Darrow "invented" Monopoly, staunch anti-monopolist Elizabeth Magie created The Landlords Game, not as the fast-paced thrill-ride we know today, but as a piece of political commentary. There were two versions: one where you could be a monopolist and crush your opponents and another where everyone benefited when wealth was created. Of course, "fun" and "politically relevant" rarely overlap, and it turned out everyone preferred the more cruel version of her game. Darrow learned that version of the game from a friend and, being a cunning entrepreneur, turned around and sold "his" idea to Parker Brothers. When Parker Brothers found out that they didn't have a monopoly on Monopoly, they tracked down Magie and bought the idea from her for $500 -- which was less than she had spent developing and promoting it in the first place.
Turns out the creation of Monopoly was just like a game of Monopoly: complicated, longer than you expected, and in the end the biggest asshole won.
I will eat your happiness…
---You will starve.
I stubbed my toe and naturally I screamed “MOTHERFUCKER” and then my dad poked his head out of the livingroom and said “you rang?”
#the ultimate dad joke
Out of every pun and play on words I’ve seen on this site, this is the one that makes me so unreasonably angry.
ATTENTION: I need attention
i’ve figured out that horror games with grotesque monsters and spooky environments are -0009 scary if you pretend you’re steve irwin on a mission to document the monster(s)
"Lookie there. That’s a six-foot grunt from the basement. A’hm gonna wrassle it."
a shotgun accessorizes any outfit.
Sorry, I wasn’t aware this was the goddamn grandma Olympics.
Merry shitscram!
---ahh yes my favorite time of year
Thursday cry moved up to Wednesday due to scheduling conflict.
YOU IDIOT!!!
----I’M SURE YOURE RIGHT BUT WHY?!
if there’s sassy gay friend can there also be sarcastic asexual friend
Brutally honest bisexual friend
Pissed off pansexual friend
i can’t believe christmas starts tomorrow
---not if you live in britain first we gotta light up some fireworks and burn shit because some guy tried to blow up parliament
The best comedy about North Korea, far better than The Interview, was made six years ago.
It’s called The Red Chapel, and it’s a documentary about two Danish-Korean comedians (and their director/manager) who go to North Korea to perform for Kim Jong Il. The idea they had was that they would do subversive comedy, they would come up with a sketch that looked like goofy slapstick but slyly mocked the North Korean government, and it would be a hilarious slap in the face to do it right in front of Kim Jong Il. That big silly wouldn’t even know they were making fun of him! Ha!
Over the course of their stay in North Korea, the idea falls apart. It becomes clear during rehearsals that their government minders are very aware of anything that could be the slightest bit subversive (or even really funny), and if any of that makes it into the final performance, the consequences will be very bad. Anything remotely satirical gets cut from the routine very early on.
Things go from demoralizing to horrific when the government minders take them on outings to see life in North Korea. Of course everyone they see looks totally fine and claims everything is wonderful. But one of the comedians has cerebral palsy, and he starts asking: why don’t I see any people like me? We’ve been here for weeks, and seen thousands of people; how is it that not one of them is visibly disabled?
He doesn’t get an answer. He breaks down emotionally and refuses to keep going along with the charade, but because his voice is hard for the North Korean minders to understand, the director “translates” his protests into praise for the regime. He’s trying to protect his friend but it’s awful and cruel and gut-wrenchingly hard to watch the scenes where the comedian is screaming “that’s not what I said!” and the director is frantically whispering “just play along!” at him.
In the end, they go out in front of a heavily coached audience and do a completely harmless show with kazoos and spring snakes and silly costumes. All hope for satire breaks down and they give exactly the show the government minders wanted, because it’s the only thing they can do. Subversiveness wouldn’t be clever; it might be fatal. Instead of getting away with something, they end up hating themselves and violating their own principles. They came to mess around with a silly weird country that doesn’t know how ridiculous it is, and instead they found themselves surrounded by very serious and real and terrifying oppression.
The Red Chapel isn’t funny, and totally fails to satirize or expose or change anything, and that’s why it’s the only good comedy about North Korea.
#[40S COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER VOICE] WHAT’S BETTER THAN THIS? GALS BEING PALS
Fun fact: Though being gay in the 40s sucked, being lesbian in the military was easier, and pretty common. There were apparently, at one point in time time so many lesbians in the military that when they tried to crack down on it, the girls wrote back and said “Look I can give you the names, but you’ll lose some of your best officers, and half your nurses and secretaries.” And they pretty much shut up about it unless you were especially bad at subtlety. (Source: Odd Girls and Twilight Lovers. A good source for gay history from 1900s onwards.)
wait but also lesbians in the WAC were so common and often had hierarchies of popular lesbians; more traditionally butch women were considered super hot and often formed cliques where they’d wear men’s suits and cut their hair to look like sideburns and smoke cigars in the mess (there was also a lot of terrible profiling done to butch women during gay/lesbian witch hunts later in the military but at least this part is fun)
also when they finally tried to crack down on lesbian relationships in the WAC it proved to be incredibly difficult because of male officers’ inability to distinguish friendly female behavior from like.. couples’ PDAs (“gal pals????” they all thought. “lesbians????” they couldn’t tell. “these women are all holding hands with each other and kissing each others’ cheeks what is going on,” they thought. “men don’t do this?”) and this wasn’t at all helped by the fact that the women would often intentionally mess with the people questioning them; they’d pull the gal pal card and they’d pull it hard. “do you two sleep in the same bed?” “well of course, we’re best friends!”
and when the military tried to profile more butch-presenting women, who often (but not exclusively!) filled more industrial jobs such as mechanics and technicians etc. they found that they were losing some of their best people who were replacing “”“male”“” homefront and reserve jobs and therefore couldn’t discharge them
another great book to read is Coming Out Under Fire by Allan Berube; it specifically addresses lesbian and gay climates in WWII, with a heavy focus on the WAC and on drag culture in the men’s army/navy
TO ALL THE WHITE WONDERBREAD WHINERS:
The whole point of Annie being a freckle faced redheaded boisterous orphan was that she was stereotyped as completely undisirable because of her ethnicity (Irish people used to face a lot of hatred), her personality (loud, vocal, open and honest), and her looks (freckles and red hair was considered to be extremely unattractive at the time that Annie was originally concieved). Redheaded people were often stereotyped as troublemakers with loud mouths and behavioral problems, and girls and women with red hair are often considered to be sexually “devious”, or more sexually mature at a younger age. These were reasons that people wouldn’t adopted redheaded freckle faced children who were probably Irish. They were considered unattractive, troublemakers, loud, and had “bad blood” and would probably become every negative stereotype for the Irish one could conjure. Now, in a time when racial representation is (slowly) growing, they chose a little black girl to replace the little ginger girl in this modern adaptation because guess what? Black children are often left to languish in the system now for the same reasons that ginger kids used to languish in orphanages then. Little black girls have all the same stereotypes slapped on them. Black children are labled as “thugs”, as “ghetto”, they’re labled as troublemakers and loudmouths; and face it- in white dominated media, as shown above, black is considered “unattractive”.
Black Annie is a true underdog now, whereas a redheaded frecklefaced child would be considered attractive (thanks very much in part to the original Annie, honestly). It is the same story, but with the real underdog orphan of this time.
White people claiming that POCs freaking out over Exodus is stupid OBVIOUSLY have never taken geography. Ramases was brown. Moses was brown. IT TOOK PLACE IN EGYPT. EVERYONE WAS BROWN OR BLACK. THEY ALL WERE PEOPLE OF COLOR. BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW IF YOU’VE FUCKING NOTICED, BUT EGYPT IS IN AFRICA. They literally changed the entire story by using white people, let alone the fact that MOSES NEVER LED THE HEBREWS INTO BATTLE, NEVER CARRIED A SWORD, NEVER PERSONALLY ENGAGED RAMASES THROUGH HIS OWN POWER.
Changing race in Annie was necessary to demonstrate truthfullness- redheaded freckle faced children are no longer underdogs in the adoption world, black children are. Changing race in Exodus was not necessary to demonstrate truthfulness and in fact essentially destroys a cornerstone of faith for millions of people worldwide, not only christians, but muslims and jews too. Moses and Ramases are part of all three of those faiths, and making them white and everyone else white is a slap in the face and was completely unnecessary in relaying the story.
The fact that this is even an issue makes me wann areach out and touch somebody. It’s Rue all over again. I wanna puke.
“But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.”
i hit my coworkers shoulder lightly and he was like “you’re going to make me cry like a girl” and i was like “what’s wrong with being a girl?” and he was quiet for a moment then he looked into the distance and whispered “the social standards they’re forced to live by”
Comparing two pictures of barely clothed women in underwear and stockings.
One being an actual woman during an anti rape protest, the other of a digital character named Quiet from the metal gear series.
The first image being labeled as feminist, the second being labeled as sexist.
But what’s the difference here?
Well, the first woman is a real human being. She controls her own body and has her own personality. She has control over her own actions and can make autonomous decisions in her life. She also has to directly deal with the people around her and the bigotry, stereotyping and harassment that she is exposed to. She is real, she has emotions, she has thoughts, and she has rights.
The second woman is fictional. She was created by other people who exert full control over her body, appearance and actions. Her sole purpose is to be literally bought and sold for the entertainment of an audience. She cannot make her own decisions, she cannot control her own body and she is not real. She is not responsible for her behavior or appearance: She is the product of the environment that she was created in.
The first woman, by virtue of being a human being who identifies with the feminist movement and acts in accordance to those beliefs, is therefore a feminist. She is actively participating in feminism and is choosing to dress herself in a manner of protest that best demonstrates that she alone controls her body, and that no others have a right to access her body without her consent. She is a multi-faceted person who has agency, and part of that agency includes the ability to look sexy while refusing to consent to her own dehumanization. Her actions are not only one small part of what makes her a person, but she is also participating within a cultural trend of protesting rape culture.
The second woman, because she is not autonomous and was designed by a series of outsiders, is sexist because she is the passive product of sexist content creators. She exists as an ornament. Her clothes were chosen as fan service so that she can be sexually available and gratifying at all times, most likely for straight male gamers. Her erotic appearance has little functional purpose other than to please an audience. And since she exists within an industry that is consistently criticized for ostracizing female participants and creating a large gap between the depictions of male and female characters, her appearance is simply one detail within a much larger array of sexist problems.
Get it?
“The Cheapest Generation: Why Aren’t Millennials Buying Cars or Houses?
What if Millennials’ aversion to car-buying isn’t a temporary side effect of the recession, but part of a permanent generational shift in tastes and spending habits? It’s a question that applies not only to cars, but to several other traditional categories of big spending—most notably, housing. And its answer has large implications for the future shape of the economy—and for the speed of recovery.”
It’s safe to say that a decent number of people reading this are a part of the Millennial generation. So, tell us: Do you own a car or house? If not, why?
----IT’S BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO DISPOSABLE INCOME YOU THUNDERING IDIOTS. Fucking preference has nothing to do with it. 50% of college graduates have no job! They all have the most student loan debt ever! What are you asking this question for?!
Also: housing is a good bit more expensive now.
My parents got a 15-year mortgage on a new house in the mid-70s. The house was $32,000. Average home price in that area now? $190,000.
So, home prices went up. Food prices went up. Health care prices went WAY UP. Rent prices went up. Higher education went up so damn high that some of us forgo that all together. Energy prices went up. Car prices went up.
Prices of prices went up.
We also pay cell phone bills, internet bills, data plans, text plans, online subscriptions, cable/satellite tv, netflix, DVR subscriptions — bills that didn’t even exist 30-40 years ago. We also use computers and smartphones and microwaves and other consumer electronics that didn’t exist 20-50 years ago.
We need medications and doctors and contact lenses and tampons and maxi pads and other things that cost money just to be alive and keep us healthy.
Most of us can’t afford to:
1. Get married and have a “Traditional” big wedding
2. Buy a house
3. Buy a new car
4. PLAN to have children
5. Take two, consecutive weeks of vacation.
Jobs that paid 50k in the late 1990s now pay between 30-35. Interest rates that favor consumers have gone down.
So I say, no. We are not choosing not to buy homes. We’re not choosing to take the bus in cities where there’s no good public transit. WE ARE NOT CHOOSING TO LIVE WHAT SOCIETY DEEMS AS AN UNDESIRABLE LIFESTYLE.
anyway, my point is: We are fucking broke.
"Hey. Hey, guys. I know the economy being fucked up is totally our fault, but what if we tell people the next generation…wants to be poor?”
An apology is NOT “I’m sorry BUT here’s why I’m totally in the right and think I did nothing wrong.”
Let me tell you a story.
My mom had a hot tub, she traded a refrigerator for it. One day the water needed changed, and I went to her, the darling teenager that I was, and said, “Mom, can we put bubble bath in the hot tub?”
She looked at me like I’d lost my damned mind, a look that I got from my mom a lot.
"But, mom, we’re going to be changing the water!," I insisted.
She told me I could, so I called all of my friends, because dear god I was putting bubble bath in the fucking hot tub, and this might be the best thing I’d done in my entire life. And with a full size bottle of bubble bath in hand we all got in the hot tub, I upended the whole bottle, and turned on the jets.
The bubbles started rising at an alarming rate, soon I could see nothing but bubbles because they’d engulfed my head. There was much laughter as we all got buried in the foam. After awhile I finally stood up. There were three feet of solid bubbles towering above the hot tub, the deck looked about like the picture above, there were bubbles in the trees, and wafting into my neighbors’ lawns. Everything was bubbles, and to date it still might be the best thing I’ve ever done in my life.
Dudes. If you feel society has lost it’s decency, let’s bring it back. Let’s start the #DudesGreetingDudes movement! Say hi to each other!
These women just don’t get it. Yáll just want to say hi. What’s wrong with hi?!?! Solet’s just leave them out completely. #DudesGreetingDudes
You see a dude looking all hard & shit. Roll up on him like “Aye yo, smile, son. Damn.” BRING SUNSHINE TO HIS DAY. #DudesGreetingDudes
“Dude, smile. You look more manly when you smile.” #DudesGreetingDudes
“If you didn’t want me to comment why you leave the house in a muscle t!” #DudesGreetingDudes
You see a dude listening to music, walk up to him, pull out one of his earbuds and ask “What we listening to bro?” #DudesGreetingDudes
*Grabs a dude’s arm as he walks pass* “Hold up, why you moving so fast?...You in a hurry? Slow down Bruh” #DudesGreetingDudes
Bruh I can’t COMPLIMENT you? I’m saying! *get’s ignored*
You know what? Fine! Those jordans are scuffed anyway! #DudesGreetingDudes
“Whats that you eating bro? You got some for me? Calm down I’m not trying to holla” #DudesGreetingDudes
*Grabs dude by waist* “Slowdown, slowdown, slowdown….where you running off too? You need company?” #DudesGreetingDudes
“Aye homie.. you mixed with something? Them waves look silky and luxurious”
T-Rex skull shower heads justify the existence of 3D printers.
*bets ass*
*wins a million butts*
nice
If its inaccessible to the poor it’s neither radical nor revolutionary
“You can tell how dangerous a person is by the way they hold their anger inside themselves quietly.”
May you write 1,500 words with ease. May your characters be lively and not cardboard. May you need little editing. May your muse visit you as soon as you sit. May the Internet not distract you much. May your phone lie dormant while you write.
I can tell myself all day, “be heartless, fuck em” but in all reality, I have a big ass heart, and can’t treat people bad, that’s just not me.
the gothest sentence in existence: “Hi Vampire.” I said flirtily as I started to sob.
Don’t worry about those who talk behind your back, they’re behind you for a reason.
Artist starter pack
notebook paper to draw on, pencil to draw with, trashcan to throw the majority of your drawings away, and tissues to cry with.
a NSFW blog but instead of porn it’s just pictures of unsafe work practices like standing on chairs and using staplers improperly.
mom can i borrow money to buy you a present
In roleplay land we don’t say I love you, we share painful headcanons and send eight thousand meme responses a day and I think that’s beautiful.
#Oh god that would be aweful!! #LETS DO IT
does anyone else have days where they just get stressed out from just being spoken to
like you jsut come out of your room and someone could say something totally nice and well meaning to you and you can’t help but feel like “aaaahHH LEAVE ME ALONE”
The surging oil finally drops in pressure enough for you to get up to the signal fire. There's a steady burble of crude oil underneath the pyre, and flammable fumes shimmer above it. You bang a couple of rocks together until you get the attention of a passing interstellar starship, which lights the pyre for you with its photon beam. Success!
This is a ghost who picked up a sheet off of one of the pieces of furniture in here, making it a very convincing ghost in a very unconvincing ghost costume.
You squat down and cluck your tongue cheerfully at the turtle until it waddles over to see what's wrong with you.
Used in the ancient native ritual "Let's Sell Some Ugly Crap To Tourists".
Be the kind of person people write books about
“It’s always surprising to me how many young women think they have to be perfect. I rarely meet a young man who doesn’t think he already is.”
At 17, I was a depressed teenager who self harmed and wondered about just how painful it could possibly be to end my life. Right now, I’m laying on the couch, and I can hear my husband reading our four year old a bedtime story using silly voices.
Life gets better. Make sure you’re there to see it.
“We blame society, but we are society.”
“It is a mark of maturity when someone hurts you, and you try to understand them.”
Mistakes are proof that you’re trying.
Things that need to stop: autism only being represented as white eight-year old boys who know a lot about trains and airplanes.
Today I was talking to my dad and I referred to myself as his son(I’m genderfluid btw) and he said “Today’s a Son day huh?”And I was like “yeah”And he was like “huh, I thought today was a Saturday, not a Sunday” And I just laughed for like 5 minutes
Diversity only makes dads stronger. More powerful. the dad jokes are evolving
"you can’t hate someone for being rude to your friend-"
excuse fucking me. my friends are the best thing that have ever happened to me. don’t expect me to sit around and watch as some asshole disrespect them and expects me to still like them.
I bet our entire universe is in a tiny glass jar placed neatly on a shelf in some alien child’s room as a science project he got a C on.
How I met your father: So basically I was in a barn and then he walks in, and obviously, the first thing I do is stab him. It didn’t work lol and now we’re married.
if artistic people are forced to take years of math and science then why don’t sciencey people have to take art and music classes
And if you’re “bad” at art and music, then “it’s okay, not everyone has an aptitude for those kinds of things” but if you’re bad at math and science, then “you’re not smart/you’re not trying hard enough”
"Would you rather crash on a friend’s couch or the freeway?" would be a good campaign slogan against drinking and driving.
you ever thought that maybe the reason girls say they’re fine when they’re not, or they’re not mad when they are, is because the second they show any semblance of emotion they’re written off as hysterical bitches that are probably on their period?
It always gets me when MRAs bring up the draft as an example of discrimination against men. Yes, it’s true that no woman in America has ever been subject to conscription in times of war; however, being that the most recent draft was in 1973, most likely neither have you. If you get to drag up stuff that happened before you were born, so does everybody else - and I’m pretty sure the ladies are going to win that particular game of misery poker.
I think we should start putting less pressure on gay people to ‘come out’ and more pressure on straight people to stop assuming everyone’s sexuality is fucking straight
I met a couple Australians this weekend and they introduced me to what is possibly the greatest phrase in the English language. Apparently, a common response to a wide variety of questions is “I’m not here to fuck spiders”. It means “I’m already doing that” or “Obviously, yeah”. So like, example usage:
At the bar with a friend.
Friend: do you want to get a beer?
Me: well, I’m not here to fuck spiders.
why are girls expected to go through an experimental lesbian phase but u never hear about dudes goin gay for a while whats up w/ that
----cause that would be realllllly weird, unlike girls doing it. guys actually like when girls do it.
do me a favor and staple all your fingertips together
headphones with antlers: The ultimate in “don’t talk to me” technology because if people keep trying to talk to you, you can just spear them in the eye.
You know those snake creature things all over Sen’s Fortress that shoot lightning at you? I was recently informed that they’re called Serpent Mages. They had the opportunity to name them Lizard Wizards and they didn’t take it. Smh…
let's talk about the physical affects of chronic anxiety because they're hardly ever acknowledged upset stomach and vomiting
ulcers
muscle aches
chronic fatigue
hormonal problems
irregular menstrual cycles
insomnia
infections
lowered immune system
migraines
shortness of breath
dizziness
heart palpitations
teeth-grinding
rashes
it is a lot more than just “feeling anxious “
The villain has the hero at gunpoint. Everything seems lost. Then the hero has an amazing idea: Make them talk. So the hero says “Now since I am as good as dead, tell me: Why are you doing this?”
The villain smiles and shoots him. Plot twist: the villain is fucking smart
I don’t know why anyone would assume I have any authority to comment on that.
The pilgrims were American colonists who escaped persecution in England in order to pursue the dream of persecuting people themselves.
the only ship i need is a scholarship can i get a hallelujah
“Large hair monster intrudes loving family dinner.”
“Afro Princess shows off her magnificent oven mitts.”
Me:*tries to go to bed at a reasonable time*
Me:ah yes
Me:4am
Me
erfectReblog if you dont shave your legs everyday. I just want everyone to see how unrealistic some expectations are.
--who the fuck shaves their legs everyday?
-----It’s winter. I need protection from the elements.
Remember that reddit post that was going around several months ago about the dude who wanted an open relationship with his girlfriend because he wanted to date “hotter” women than his fat girlfriend but then when she agreed she was dating tons of hot guys and he couldn’t get a single woman to date him so he wanted to close the relationship because he thought it was unfair?
Sometimes I think about that and it gives me life.
bae:tell me your wildest fantasy
me:i'm financially stable in a job that i love with great opportunities for career advancement. i live in a modest home with a good sized yard and a fence for my dogs, there are hardly any problems with the home, but sometimes the garbage disposal clogs. the fridge and pantry are never empty and when they're getting low, i can go to the grocery store at my leisure. my pre-owned car never makes funny noises and when it does, i have the money to take it to the mechanic. i am in good health and most days, i have the energy to carry out my daily tasks and do some things i enjoy as well.
15 different kinds of love
Infatuation- loving feelings towards a love object that are largely based upon fantasy and idealization (instead of experience). Often when partners get to know each other, infatuation diminishes.
Romantic Love- An abiding love for a partner with whom you feel passion, attraction, caring and respect.
Eros- a passionate love usually involving sexual feelings for a love interest.
Companionate Love- feelings of warmth towards a friend with whom you love to spend time
Unconditional Love- A type of affection and caring that is so strong that you feel it consistently, regardless of what that other person does
Conditional Love- A love that requires specific action or conditions in order to be maintained. For example, at its extreme, a parent who gives very conditional love would only love his child when he gets straight A’s, becomes a surgeon and has two children. The love is based on outside conditions and when they do not occur, the love is withdrawn.
Puppy Love- A childish, innocent temporary crush on someone that you don’t know well.
Maternal Love- This term usually connotes love that is nurturing, accepting and protective. In actuality this love can also be given by a father etc.
Paternal Love- This term connotes love that involves guidance and some authority. Paternal love usually prepares a child to be ready for the outside world. Again, in reality this type of love is not gender specific.
Soulmate Love- This type of love is described as a love that has survived multiple life times. Not everyone believes in this concept.
Spiritual/Divine Love- This type of love recognizes the Divine light in everyone and everything. Love is given to everyone as an act of loving God.
Love of your country or patriotism- This is love for the place you live or the place that were born. It is a type of loyalty and a special feeling of belonging that you attribute to that specific geographic location.
Self-Love- This is a positive feeling that you have about who you are and what you deserve. It often is expressed by treating yourself well, respecting yourself, wanting yourself to be happy and expecting others to respect you too.
Brotherly Love- This term connotes having a feeling of love for your neighbor, because all humanity is considered to be part of a larger family of human beings.
Tough Love- This term is used to describe a love that is expressed by setting boundaries for the good of the other person. So for example, a parent may send their teenager to rehab if he is drug addicted, even if he does not want to go. They feel that this is an act of love because it stems from a desire for their son’s ultimate good and happiness.
Women:Why do men spit in public?
Men:Where ELSE should we spit? On you??? Do you want us to spit on YOU!?! Alright, FINE.
Women:A teenage girls bra strap shouldn't be a reason to send her home.
Men
kay. Okay, alright. Alright, okay, okay. Well why don't I just PULL MY DICK OUT IN CLASS THEN!?!?Women:A person should have the right to an abortion.
Men
hhhhh women want abortions! Well men should be able to rape them, that seems like the logical equivalent of this situation.Women:Women need to defend themselves from violent men.
Men
h, what, you can hit me but I can't hit you!? why CAN'T I hit you? WHEN can I hit you??? Tell me when I can hit you, please. I want to know. I need to know.Women:Men overreact a lot.
Men:WHOA. Why would you go there? Why do you generalize all men like that? I feel so attacked. This is so hurtful.
Men:This is why no one likes feminists.
I love this story because this guy in the early 1800’s had so many great childhood memories of this tree and wanted to make sure it was protected no matter what. So he deeded the ownership of the tree to itself and everyone just went with it.
Then in 1942 this intense windstorm came and knocked the tree over. And people were bummed. But someone had saved an acorn from the original tree, so they planted that and now Son of the Tree That Owns Itself is over 50 feet tall.
And since this new tree is technically the offspring of the original tree it’s considered to have legally inherited the plot of land it’s inhabiting.
Two generations of trees owning land is amazing and if you don’t think this is the coolest thing get right out of my face.
how dare this younger generation enjoy casual hookups and temporary dating…back in my day we got married to our first crushes when we were 18 and ended up unhappy by the time we were 40
like when an ugly nigga tell you you cute you gotta wonder if you ugly and that an ugly nigga think you within his ugly ass league
What if the cure for cancer is trapped inside the mind of someone who can’t afford an education?
Why is body hair only unhygienic when it’s on a woman’s body?
do you ever talk to your parents about feminist or racism issues and realize how sexist and racist they really are?
let’s bring back the term “cats” when referring to a group of people (i.e. “see you cats later”)
pros:
it’s gender neutral
you get the chance to look like a cool jazz musician
you can compare all your friends to cats (always good)
cons:
????
all i really want from my life is a legitimate reason to pin a bunch of photos and newspaper fragments on a huge cork board and connect them with long strings of yarn
Stupidest things ive ever heard on the internet so far:
"boobs were made for men not for feeding babies!!!!!!!!!! stop using boobs for anything other than pleasing us!!!"
"How dare babies pass though the vagina during birth, don’t they know vaginas are for a men’s penis"
Straight people don’t get to destermine what homophobia is.
Men don’t get to determine what women consider harassment.
White people don’t get to determine what racisim is like for people of color.
the snoot advanced
get learned how to make stuff more deader.
Straight people have been stealing from the gay community for ages now. Especially from the black gay/trans community.
“Grade 1
Students in Grade 1 will be taught the proper names for body parts – something child-abuse investigators have long urged.
They will also learn how to recognize non-verbal signals, such as facial expressions and tone of voice, to better communicate with others.
Grade 2
In Grade 2, students will learn about bodily changes and development, verbal and physical violence, and the concept that “no means no.”
Grades 3-4
Grade 3 students will learn about same-sex relationships, while the physical, emotional and social impacts of puberty will move from Grade 5 to Grade 4.
Grades 5-6
In Grade 5, students will continue learning about puberty, including menstruation and spermatogenesis, and how these processes relate to reproduction.
Students in Grade 6 will learn about masturbation and “gender expression.” They will also be educated on how to build healthy relationships and consent.
Grades 7-8
In Grades 7-8, students will learn about the dangers of “sexting.”
They will also discuss contraception, anal and oral sex, and ways to prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections.
Grades 9-10
Teaching materials on mental health, previously relegated to older grades, will be introduced in Grade 9. Grade 9 students will also explore gender identity, sexual orientation and the resources available for support.
In Grade 10, students will continue to learn what factors influence sexual decision-making, including personal values, peer and family expectations, and media messages.
Under the current sex education program, Grades 9 and 10 students focus on promoting healthy sexuality, preventing sexually transmitted infections, and identifying the stages of sexuality.
Grades 11-12
Similarly to the existing program, students in Grades 11 and 12 will focus on how to use decision-making skills to create healthy relationships.
They will also learn about reducing the stigma around mental illness, and taking proactive health measures.”
---Do you understand how fantastic this is? Sex Ed has not been changed since the time that I was born and now we’re going to be have education on gender identities, sexual orientations are going to be taught from a young age on the importance of consent and the enforcement of how “no is no”. Older students are going to be learning about mental health and how to reduce the stigma around it. This is not the training of “abstinence is key”. Take note America
I just realized the climax of the Lion King is kind of hilarious.
Because it came down to a showdown fight between Scar and Simba. And here’s something great about them: they are the weakest little shits.
Scar was this skinny twig of a lion who probably only got the 11th+ portion of any kill because nobody liked him, and the only way he could one-up anyone was through trickery, and/or by softening them up with a wildebeest herd.
Simba grew up without ever having to chase his prey or work particularly hard because he lived on a diet of insects and nothing else. Nala could kick his ass because she was a goddamn proper hunter.
So the final battle was the equivalent to a pasty-faced metrosexual teen slap-fighting a starving 60-year old
Convo between my 7 year-old students today
Josie:I have a new crusshhhhh
Matt:Me too! On a boy!
Pearl:You're a boy with a crush on a boy?
Matt:Yeah he's really cute.
Pearl
h.(pause for a bit)
Matt
oys can like boys. I just can't marry him because boys can't marry boys.Me:Yeah they can. You can marry whoever you want.
Matt:Really?
Josie:YEAH my tia has a wife so now I have a titi and a auntie.
Matt
kay. Then maybe I'll marry him.Dave
from across the room) No you can't you're seven.(Age was apparently the only foreseeable problem anyone of my elementary schoolers could see with gay marriage.)
Learn to take a compliment?
How about learn to give a compliment.
Because street harassment is not a compliment.
like it’s not “whoops I’m PREGNANT AGAIN tee hee time for an abortion!!”
nobody fuckin does that. Nobody .
it’s more along the lines of do you want an abortion or do you want to die?
do you want an abortion or do you want to watch your baby die after a week?
do you want an abortion or do you want your life to fall apart around you because of a child you are either unable or unfit to support?
do you want to give up a fetus or a living, breathing baby you could potentially wreck your body and threaten your life for?
“The men in Hollywood event is every day—it’s called Hollywood. Fifty-one percent of the population should not have to have to schedule a special event to celebrate the fact that in an art that tells the story of what it means to be human and alive, we get to play a part.
My husband and I do kind of the same job — a little bit. Not long ago we both had one of those magical days which we call a junket, where we both attended these lovely events where people come in every four minutes and they ask the same questions over and over again, you know the drill. We got home at night and we compared notes.
And I told him every single person who interviewed me, I mean every single one, and this is true of the red carpet here tonight, Elle, asked me, ‘How do you balance work and family?’ and he said the only thing that people asked him repeatedly was about the tits on the ‘Blurred Lines’ girl [Emily Ratajkowski his co-star in Gone Girl].
As for work-life balance, he said no one asked him about it that day. As a matter of fact, no one had ever asked him about it. And we do share the same family. Isn’t it time to kinda change that conversation?”
“"Get a better job," they said.
Suddenly, every custodian everywhere quits their job and gets a better one. Now, upon entering public restrooms, everyone is handed a spray bottle and toilet brush, because now they have to scrub their own shit out of that public porcelain throne. Women’s restrooms come complete with plastic bags, because they have to bring their soiled period products home with them and dispose of them at home, because there is no more public waste removal.
"Get a better job," they said.
All fast food employees quit and find a “better job”. No more fast food places! There also aren’t any restaurants. Better learn to cook your own shitty garbage burgers. You have only yourself to yell at if you forget the cheese.
"Get a better job," they said.
Retail stores no longer have any employees. All shopping must be done online, but you have to drive out and pick up the supplies yourself because the Fedex people quit and got better jobs, too.
"Just get a better job," they said!
You now have to grow and make every single thing you ever consume for the rest of your life, because no one wants to do it for you at $7 an hour.
Fuck you.”
I belong somewhere tropical. I am so tired of snow, farmlands, and cold weather. I want beaches and palms…
person:i'm super socially awkward cuz i crush on a fictional character
me
h yeah who?person:this vampire assassin badboy with a motorbike
me:i'm crushing on a fictional Valkyrie who isn't even a Valkyrie but an actor who is stuck on a deserted island and thinks she is still on stage and she only eats meat and is surrounded by shitty pun monsters
person:yeah but he has a motorbike
me:yeah but she has a sweetass helmet
apparently it costs $241,000 to raise a kid
"Homophobia: The fear that another man will treat you like you treat women."
When I say “boys are dumb” what I really mean is “boys have been raised in a patriarchal society that forces them into an incorrect and problematic view of masculinity that not only forces them to strip away valuable virtues from themselves, like patience and gentleness, but also forces them to view and treat women in unhealthy ways that devalues women as people and makes them into objects purely for a man’s benefit”
but it’s a lot faster to say “boys are dumb”
((WHICH GODDESS IS KNOWN FOR BEING THE MOST BEAUTIFUL?)))
DONT ASK ME THIS, THIS IS HOW THE TROJAN WAR STARTED, I DONT WANT THIS MAN!!!!!!
And then I’m just like, “DAMMIT, DID YOU LEARN NOTHING FROM PARIS? YOU ARE AN EMBARRASSMENT, AND NOW ALL THE TROJANS ARE DEAD. I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY.”
---If you are ever actually in this situation, pro-tip: name Persephone. Half the goddesses will be too surprised to smite you immediately and while Hades won’t do you any favors he may at least high-five you while your on your way down.
----Another tip: name Mesperyian. Not only will you shock everyone, including her (since Aphrodite was a jealous ho who burnt half her face off), but you’ll win Hades’ favour. As his most beloved daughter, anything that praises her will make you a kind human to her, an okay human to him, and a genuinely good person to anyone else.
I love how all of this advice leads to “please Hades at all costs.”
no1 cares if ur vegan or a vegetarian what we’re annoyed with is that you insist that ur better than us and that we’re satan or something because we eat meat omfg
----You’re supporting an industry that condones the murder and abuse of billions of lives. You’re not Satan, you’re God. Satan kills far fewer people.
did you just call me god?
If martin luther king were still alive, then his granddaughter would have recently celebrated her 6th birthday.
Not great-granddaughter, just granddaughter. think about how little time ago the civil rights movement actually happened, and understand that there is still much work to be done for equality.
It's amazing to me how sick everyone is of talking about ladies, considering how rare it is for us to talk about actual ladies. I mean, specific people who happen to be ladies, rather than the abstract, intangible concept of "ladies" and lady-ness. "Ladies," we'll say, and then sit back and sip at our cappuccino/Scotch/Shirley Temple. "They sure are that thing they be. I wonder if it's possible for them to be funny or do math." Meanwhile, in the background, actual ladies with body-hair and smelly armpits and bad tempers are inventing computers and punk rock and, like, pies too probably (now I'm just listing my favorite things). And we were too busy nursing our Shirley Temples to even notice.
Thirty years before Charles Darrow "invented" Monopoly, staunch anti-monopolist Elizabeth Magie created The Landlords Game, not as the fast-paced thrill-ride we know today, but as a piece of political commentary. There were two versions: one where you could be a monopolist and crush your opponents and another where everyone benefited when wealth was created. Of course, "fun" and "politically relevant" rarely overlap, and it turned out everyone preferred the more cruel version of her game. Darrow learned that version of the game from a friend and, being a cunning entrepreneur, turned around and sold "his" idea to Parker Brothers. When Parker Brothers found out that they didn't have a monopoly on Monopoly, they tracked down Magie and bought the idea from her for $500 -- which was less than she had spent developing and promoting it in the first place.
Turns out the creation of Monopoly was just like a game of Monopoly: complicated, longer than you expected, and in the end the biggest asshole won.
I will eat your happiness…
---You will starve.
I stubbed my toe and naturally I screamed “MOTHERFUCKER” and then my dad poked his head out of the livingroom and said “you rang?”
#the ultimate dad joke
Out of every pun and play on words I’ve seen on this site, this is the one that makes me so unreasonably angry.
ATTENTION: I need attention
i’ve figured out that horror games with grotesque monsters and spooky environments are -0009 scary if you pretend you’re steve irwin on a mission to document the monster(s)
"Lookie there. That’s a six-foot grunt from the basement. A’hm gonna wrassle it."
a shotgun accessorizes any outfit.
Sorry, I wasn’t aware this was the goddamn grandma Olympics.
Merry shitscram!
---ahh yes my favorite time of year
Thursday cry moved up to Wednesday due to scheduling conflict.
YOU IDIOT!!!
----I’M SURE YOURE RIGHT BUT WHY?!
if there’s sassy gay friend can there also be sarcastic asexual friend
Brutally honest bisexual friend
Pissed off pansexual friend
i can’t believe christmas starts tomorrow
---not if you live in britain first we gotta light up some fireworks and burn shit because some guy tried to blow up parliament
The best comedy about North Korea, far better than The Interview, was made six years ago.
It’s called The Red Chapel, and it’s a documentary about two Danish-Korean comedians (and their director/manager) who go to North Korea to perform for Kim Jong Il. The idea they had was that they would do subversive comedy, they would come up with a sketch that looked like goofy slapstick but slyly mocked the North Korean government, and it would be a hilarious slap in the face to do it right in front of Kim Jong Il. That big silly wouldn’t even know they were making fun of him! Ha!
Over the course of their stay in North Korea, the idea falls apart. It becomes clear during rehearsals that their government minders are very aware of anything that could be the slightest bit subversive (or even really funny), and if any of that makes it into the final performance, the consequences will be very bad. Anything remotely satirical gets cut from the routine very early on.
Things go from demoralizing to horrific when the government minders take them on outings to see life in North Korea. Of course everyone they see looks totally fine and claims everything is wonderful. But one of the comedians has cerebral palsy, and he starts asking: why don’t I see any people like me? We’ve been here for weeks, and seen thousands of people; how is it that not one of them is visibly disabled?
He doesn’t get an answer. He breaks down emotionally and refuses to keep going along with the charade, but because his voice is hard for the North Korean minders to understand, the director “translates” his protests into praise for the regime. He’s trying to protect his friend but it’s awful and cruel and gut-wrenchingly hard to watch the scenes where the comedian is screaming “that’s not what I said!” and the director is frantically whispering “just play along!” at him.
In the end, they go out in front of a heavily coached audience and do a completely harmless show with kazoos and spring snakes and silly costumes. All hope for satire breaks down and they give exactly the show the government minders wanted, because it’s the only thing they can do. Subversiveness wouldn’t be clever; it might be fatal. Instead of getting away with something, they end up hating themselves and violating their own principles. They came to mess around with a silly weird country that doesn’t know how ridiculous it is, and instead they found themselves surrounded by very serious and real and terrifying oppression.
The Red Chapel isn’t funny, and totally fails to satirize or expose or change anything, and that’s why it’s the only good comedy about North Korea.
#[40S COMMERCIAL ANNOUNCER VOICE] WHAT’S BETTER THAN THIS? GALS BEING PALS
Fun fact: Though being gay in the 40s sucked, being lesbian in the military was easier, and pretty common. There were apparently, at one point in time time so many lesbians in the military that when they tried to crack down on it, the girls wrote back and said “Look I can give you the names, but you’ll lose some of your best officers, and half your nurses and secretaries.” And they pretty much shut up about it unless you were especially bad at subtlety. (Source: Odd Girls and Twilight Lovers. A good source for gay history from 1900s onwards.)
wait but also lesbians in the WAC were so common and often had hierarchies of popular lesbians; more traditionally butch women were considered super hot and often formed cliques where they’d wear men’s suits and cut their hair to look like sideburns and smoke cigars in the mess (there was also a lot of terrible profiling done to butch women during gay/lesbian witch hunts later in the military but at least this part is fun)
also when they finally tried to crack down on lesbian relationships in the WAC it proved to be incredibly difficult because of male officers’ inability to distinguish friendly female behavior from like.. couples’ PDAs (“gal pals????” they all thought. “lesbians????” they couldn’t tell. “these women are all holding hands with each other and kissing each others’ cheeks what is going on,” they thought. “men don’t do this?”) and this wasn’t at all helped by the fact that the women would often intentionally mess with the people questioning them; they’d pull the gal pal card and they’d pull it hard. “do you two sleep in the same bed?” “well of course, we’re best friends!”
and when the military tried to profile more butch-presenting women, who often (but not exclusively!) filled more industrial jobs such as mechanics and technicians etc. they found that they were losing some of their best people who were replacing “”“male”“” homefront and reserve jobs and therefore couldn’t discharge them
another great book to read is Coming Out Under Fire by Allan Berube; it specifically addresses lesbian and gay climates in WWII, with a heavy focus on the WAC and on drag culture in the men’s army/navy
TO ALL THE WHITE WONDERBREAD WHINERS:
The whole point of Annie being a freckle faced redheaded boisterous orphan was that she was stereotyped as completely undisirable because of her ethnicity (Irish people used to face a lot of hatred), her personality (loud, vocal, open and honest), and her looks (freckles and red hair was considered to be extremely unattractive at the time that Annie was originally concieved). Redheaded people were often stereotyped as troublemakers with loud mouths and behavioral problems, and girls and women with red hair are often considered to be sexually “devious”, or more sexually mature at a younger age. These were reasons that people wouldn’t adopted redheaded freckle faced children who were probably Irish. They were considered unattractive, troublemakers, loud, and had “bad blood” and would probably become every negative stereotype for the Irish one could conjure. Now, in a time when racial representation is (slowly) growing, they chose a little black girl to replace the little ginger girl in this modern adaptation because guess what? Black children are often left to languish in the system now for the same reasons that ginger kids used to languish in orphanages then. Little black girls have all the same stereotypes slapped on them. Black children are labled as “thugs”, as “ghetto”, they’re labled as troublemakers and loudmouths; and face it- in white dominated media, as shown above, black is considered “unattractive”.
Black Annie is a true underdog now, whereas a redheaded frecklefaced child would be considered attractive (thanks very much in part to the original Annie, honestly). It is the same story, but with the real underdog orphan of this time.
White people claiming that POCs freaking out over Exodus is stupid OBVIOUSLY have never taken geography. Ramases was brown. Moses was brown. IT TOOK PLACE IN EGYPT. EVERYONE WAS BROWN OR BLACK. THEY ALL WERE PEOPLE OF COLOR. BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW IF YOU’VE FUCKING NOTICED, BUT EGYPT IS IN AFRICA. They literally changed the entire story by using white people, let alone the fact that MOSES NEVER LED THE HEBREWS INTO BATTLE, NEVER CARRIED A SWORD, NEVER PERSONALLY ENGAGED RAMASES THROUGH HIS OWN POWER.
Changing race in Annie was necessary to demonstrate truthfullness- redheaded freckle faced children are no longer underdogs in the adoption world, black children are. Changing race in Exodus was not necessary to demonstrate truthfulness and in fact essentially destroys a cornerstone of faith for millions of people worldwide, not only christians, but muslims and jews too. Moses and Ramases are part of all three of those faiths, and making them white and everyone else white is a slap in the face and was completely unnecessary in relaying the story.
The fact that this is even an issue makes me wann areach out and touch somebody. It’s Rue all over again. I wanna puke.
“But remember, there are two ways to dehumanize someone: by dismissing them, and by idolizing them.”
i hit my coworkers shoulder lightly and he was like “you’re going to make me cry like a girl” and i was like “what’s wrong with being a girl?” and he was quiet for a moment then he looked into the distance and whispered “the social standards they’re forced to live by”
Comparing two pictures of barely clothed women in underwear and stockings.
One being an actual woman during an anti rape protest, the other of a digital character named Quiet from the metal gear series.
The first image being labeled as feminist, the second being labeled as sexist.
But what’s the difference here?
Well, the first woman is a real human being. She controls her own body and has her own personality. She has control over her own actions and can make autonomous decisions in her life. She also has to directly deal with the people around her and the bigotry, stereotyping and harassment that she is exposed to. She is real, she has emotions, she has thoughts, and she has rights.
The second woman is fictional. She was created by other people who exert full control over her body, appearance and actions. Her sole purpose is to be literally bought and sold for the entertainment of an audience. She cannot make her own decisions, she cannot control her own body and she is not real. She is not responsible for her behavior or appearance: She is the product of the environment that she was created in.
The first woman, by virtue of being a human being who identifies with the feminist movement and acts in accordance to those beliefs, is therefore a feminist. She is actively participating in feminism and is choosing to dress herself in a manner of protest that best demonstrates that she alone controls her body, and that no others have a right to access her body without her consent. She is a multi-faceted person who has agency, and part of that agency includes the ability to look sexy while refusing to consent to her own dehumanization. Her actions are not only one small part of what makes her a person, but she is also participating within a cultural trend of protesting rape culture.
The second woman, because she is not autonomous and was designed by a series of outsiders, is sexist because she is the passive product of sexist content creators. She exists as an ornament. Her clothes were chosen as fan service so that she can be sexually available and gratifying at all times, most likely for straight male gamers. Her erotic appearance has little functional purpose other than to please an audience. And since she exists within an industry that is consistently criticized for ostracizing female participants and creating a large gap between the depictions of male and female characters, her appearance is simply one detail within a much larger array of sexist problems.
Get it?
“The Cheapest Generation: Why Aren’t Millennials Buying Cars or Houses?
What if Millennials’ aversion to car-buying isn’t a temporary side effect of the recession, but part of a permanent generational shift in tastes and spending habits? It’s a question that applies not only to cars, but to several other traditional categories of big spending—most notably, housing. And its answer has large implications for the future shape of the economy—and for the speed of recovery.”
It’s safe to say that a decent number of people reading this are a part of the Millennial generation. So, tell us: Do you own a car or house? If not, why?
----IT’S BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO DISPOSABLE INCOME YOU THUNDERING IDIOTS. Fucking preference has nothing to do with it. 50% of college graduates have no job! They all have the most student loan debt ever! What are you asking this question for?!
Also: housing is a good bit more expensive now.
My parents got a 15-year mortgage on a new house in the mid-70s. The house was $32,000. Average home price in that area now? $190,000.
So, home prices went up. Food prices went up. Health care prices went WAY UP. Rent prices went up. Higher education went up so damn high that some of us forgo that all together. Energy prices went up. Car prices went up.
Prices of prices went up.
We also pay cell phone bills, internet bills, data plans, text plans, online subscriptions, cable/satellite tv, netflix, DVR subscriptions — bills that didn’t even exist 30-40 years ago. We also use computers and smartphones and microwaves and other consumer electronics that didn’t exist 20-50 years ago.
We need medications and doctors and contact lenses and tampons and maxi pads and other things that cost money just to be alive and keep us healthy.
Most of us can’t afford to:
1. Get married and have a “Traditional” big wedding
2. Buy a house
3. Buy a new car
4. PLAN to have children
5. Take two, consecutive weeks of vacation.
Jobs that paid 50k in the late 1990s now pay between 30-35. Interest rates that favor consumers have gone down.
So I say, no. We are not choosing not to buy homes. We’re not choosing to take the bus in cities where there’s no good public transit. WE ARE NOT CHOOSING TO LIVE WHAT SOCIETY DEEMS AS AN UNDESIRABLE LIFESTYLE.
anyway, my point is: We are fucking broke.
"Hey. Hey, guys. I know the economy being fucked up is totally our fault, but what if we tell people the next generation…wants to be poor?”
An apology is NOT “I’m sorry BUT here’s why I’m totally in the right and think I did nothing wrong.”
Let me tell you a story.
My mom had a hot tub, she traded a refrigerator for it. One day the water needed changed, and I went to her, the darling teenager that I was, and said, “Mom, can we put bubble bath in the hot tub?”
She looked at me like I’d lost my damned mind, a look that I got from my mom a lot.
"But, mom, we’re going to be changing the water!," I insisted.
She told me I could, so I called all of my friends, because dear god I was putting bubble bath in the fucking hot tub, and this might be the best thing I’d done in my entire life. And with a full size bottle of bubble bath in hand we all got in the hot tub, I upended the whole bottle, and turned on the jets.
The bubbles started rising at an alarming rate, soon I could see nothing but bubbles because they’d engulfed my head. There was much laughter as we all got buried in the foam. After awhile I finally stood up. There were three feet of solid bubbles towering above the hot tub, the deck looked about like the picture above, there were bubbles in the trees, and wafting into my neighbors’ lawns. Everything was bubbles, and to date it still might be the best thing I’ve ever done in my life.
Dudes. If you feel society has lost it’s decency, let’s bring it back. Let’s start the #DudesGreetingDudes movement! Say hi to each other!
These women just don’t get it. Yáll just want to say hi. What’s wrong with hi?!?! Solet’s just leave them out completely. #DudesGreetingDudes
You see a dude looking all hard & shit. Roll up on him like “Aye yo, smile, son. Damn.” BRING SUNSHINE TO HIS DAY. #DudesGreetingDudes
“Dude, smile. You look more manly when you smile.” #DudesGreetingDudes
“If you didn’t want me to comment why you leave the house in a muscle t!” #DudesGreetingDudes
You see a dude listening to music, walk up to him, pull out one of his earbuds and ask “What we listening to bro?” #DudesGreetingDudes
*Grabs a dude’s arm as he walks pass* “Hold up, why you moving so fast?...You in a hurry? Slow down Bruh” #DudesGreetingDudes
Bruh I can’t COMPLIMENT you? I’m saying! *get’s ignored*
You know what? Fine! Those jordans are scuffed anyway! #DudesGreetingDudes
“Whats that you eating bro? You got some for me? Calm down I’m not trying to holla” #DudesGreetingDudes
*Grabs dude by waist* “Slowdown, slowdown, slowdown….where you running off too? You need company?” #DudesGreetingDudes
“Aye homie.. you mixed with something? Them waves look silky and luxurious”
T-Rex skull shower heads justify the existence of 3D printers.
This one's a bit ho-hum as far as my quote references go, but it's got some good stuff in there.
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here are the other ones
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Me and my mother loved it