Smexy AU based on Stranga's slender class systems

So In this hypothetical alternate universe, Smexy is the one mostly responsible for there being a Slenderman civilization in the first place, with it all starting out thousands of years ago close to when the slender brothers first appeared.
Offenderman, not content with his brothers plans to exist outside of the human’s culture, decided to go against their whims and just make himself the deity of a race of people, people that would later go on to become the romans.

He was able to keep this all going behind his brothers backs for centuries by simply never having his people be aware of his appearance enough to be recognizable, or have any of their deity’s be explicitly recognizable as him either, instead just lazily copy-pasting  a whole pantheon of deity’s from a bunch of other nearby cultures, which his people gradually just refined into pretty much “the greek pantheon but with different names” as they started to take off and run with it on their own, with a few of the deity’s  of other cultures he had originally intended to be integrated into his misch-mash of a religion either getting converted into legend’s and fairy tales, or just getting scrapped altogether, with offender not bothering with trying to correct them over any of it because 1: he couldn’t be bothered 2: he wasn’t very creative in the first place so of course most of his so called pantheon of deity’s wouldn’t function well together, and 3: it was enough that they had SOME sort of religion that didn’t connect back to him in any blatant ways, so anything beyond that wasn’t really all that necessary.

Not to mention, with it keeping him so busy, his brothers were more and more inclined to simply ignore whatever he was up to because it meant keeping their obnoxious brother from bothering them.


And so, with the incredibly unfair advantage of having an immortal, incredibly powerful slenderbeing’s favor, the influence of his people kept growing and growing, with Offenderman getting sloppier and sloppier about hiding his direct hand in the romans culture and its growing success as the centuries passed.

With more and more of the roman culture following in his examples both in their art and their culture, eventually his brother’s caught on, and were royally pissed beyond belief.
Offenderman had to flee in order to avoid his harsh punishment; moving past the boundaries of his empire and deep into the African continent, where he stayed for many years, with the Roman Empire eventually falling some generations later, and his brothers gradually forgetting about him over the years.
At least, until a bunch of new dark skinned slenderbeings started showing up.

The Ender Men.

It turned out that, while the slender brothers had been careful to never divulge the technique for turning human beings into slender-beings to Offender because they weren’t that stupid and knew their brother would abuse the hell out of the ability if given the chance, (on top of the fact that they knew it was impossible for a slender to breed with a human mostly thanks to offender trying so many times)
So they wouldn’t have to go through the unsavory task of regulating him on that front, and assumed it would never be a problem in the future.
But they hadn’t counted on him discovering another species that he COULD breed with.

Potentially some sort of sub-species of slender beings living deep in the inhospitable deserts of Africa in small nomadic groups, they are said to have already had certain ability’s shared with the northern slender’s even when Offenderman encountered them, such as the ability to teleport, but they were different in many ways, some of which have been lost to time.

Never the less, apparently they were compatible enough with Offender that he was able to sire half-breed offspring with them.
And breed he did.

By the time his brother’s even got wind of what was happening, the original species of the Enderman , which were said to have green eyes and rather short lifespans of about a year or two, was extinct, replaced with thousands upon thousands of these half-breed endermen, which had either been sired by Offenderman directly, or were the children of his children, as they had no problem expanding the population on their own, so now the majority of the species, even the ones far removed from Offendermans direct lineage, could show signs of his ancestry through their bright purple or pinkish eyes, whereas their ancestors were exclusively green eyed.

Upon hearing wind of what Offender had done in his exile, and the growing half-breed slenderbeing civilization he was creating, they eventually just decided to throw up their hands in defeat and annoyance, and basically say
“We give up! You insist on making your own civilizations? Fine. Let’s just make a legitimate slender-being civilization and then be done with it!”,
and started turning humans to slenderbeings in record numbers.

It was around the early middle ages that the new civilization had stabilized into community’s not requiring the brothers direct control, with the first few generations of natural born slender beings, (rather than turned from humans), reaching adulthood.
They had built up their own government based on the monarchies of the time, but split three ways between the decedents of the three active brothers, as Offender was still banished at the time.

They had heard of his existence, but otherwise didn’t know too much about the “fourth brother”, and in all honesty, they were still a little bit too racist to try and give the endermen half-breeds that had integrated themselves into the society places of power within their government in the fourth brother’s absence.
However as time went on, they became increasingly fascinated by the myth of him, especially once they had learned that he was apparently responsible for the Roman Empire, which had led to them quickly embracing the “majesty” of the Roman Empire as a part of their own slender cultural history, much like a number of the Cristian religious sects of the time had.

And so, not long after, a number of these slender-beings decided to take some initiative and try to welcome this fourth brother to their growing city… but they did so without consulting any of the three brothers beforehand.
Following one of the endermen back to the deserts of Africa where Offender still resided, they quickly found him and made their offer for him to come join their new civilization, with Offender accepting, and returning back to their growing city with them…..
and then quickly took over the civilization in the worst way.

Up until then, the new slender society had been rather peaceful overall, following mostly by the example of Splendorman, who’s decedent’s had ended up making up the majority of the population in no small part due to them simply being the most effective at child rearing, and generally regarded as being the best spouses of the slenderbeings, and therefore having the most children.

But Offenderman didn’t want peace, he wanted Rome back, with interest for all the years he had lived without its excessive decadence and warmongering, and the slender-beings were not nearly as resilient to his demands for bloodshed as the biologically slow to anger and unsuited to warfare endermen culture had been.

Gladiatorial combat became increasingly frequent and commonplace, and often amounted to little more than sacrifices to amuse Offender, either by fighting each other to the death, or by going up against Offender himself, who was eager for something resembling a real challenge for him, having had little more beyond wild animals to provide him with sport ,thanks to the largely non- combative endermen (Although he had still managed to kill a great deal of humans as well during that time, reducing a number of ancient city’s to ruin.)

He also encouraged more aggressive treatment for the humans in the surrounding areas as well, encouraging his supporters to sadistically murder them in the hundreds, and yet at the same time, perhaps even more controversially, also demanded that they assimilate plain, unturned humans into the slender culture as well, (along with a large number of his endermen children, but mostly it was the humans thing that they took issue with.)
Most of the humans brought in had places of low power and respect within the community and were were used as servant’s and concubines yes, but with the whole “getting it on with humans” being pretty frowned upon by that time, it wasn’t taken well.
But worst of all, almost like a joke, he would start putting some of these humans into places of power in the society to speak on his behalf, (so essentially as proxies, but before that term was coined) and encouraging the humans to abuse their power just as much as Offender would, most prominently by setting the slender citizens to do essentially slave labor to work on building up the architecture of the area so Offender could have his fancy buildings and fountains and whatnot.

Even when the slender-beings provided him with the knowledge of how to turn humans into more slender beings that had been kept from him by his brothers for all these years in the hope of fixing this penchant he has for the use of humans as his servant’s, it didn’t cause him to change his views on humans, it just led him to doing exactly the thing his brothers were afraid of, abusing the power to create an immense amount of slenderbeings practically at random, slenderbeings that the society wasn’t nearly prepared enough to properly assimilate in such numbers.

While on top of all the chaos being caused by that, he also brought in a number of narcotic substances to the civilization that he encouraged the recreational abuse of, even to the young ones, while at the same time, as could be expected of him, he tried to bring up the debauchery of the slender beings to untold levels.

He practically regarded the whole culture as his own personal harem,  picking and choosing members for him to molest often at random, whether male or female, or else because they tried to speak up against him and he wasn’t feeling like sending them to die in a gladiatorial ring at the time.
Sometimes even going so far as to take children from their parents for this purpose as punishment.

And the other three brother’s during this?
Well they were held back from intervening by Slenderman, who was angry at their people for having gone behind the brothers back to allow Offenderman to return despite their warnings, refused to assist them, and instead decided to let them stew in their own terrible mistake for about 20 years, although it was cut short when Splendorman decided he couldn’t take it anymore and intervened on his own with a plan to take care of his tyrannical brother for good.

He went and spoke with Offenderman, saying how Slenderman might be allowing him to get away with this behavior for now, but it won’t last for much longer, and that they can’t condone his behavior period, and would want him to be exiled forever once the slender-beings had learned their lesson for disobeying them, as they know he isn’t going to change his ways anytime soon.
But, however, he had a plan for something of a compromise, a way Offender could remain a part of their culture.
He had a plan that he would split offender into 2 parts, and allow the part of his brother that could behave, to remain a part of their civilization, while only banishing the part that would do harm to their people.

Offender agreed to it with surprisingly little convincing, mostly because he just figured it would be an interesting change of pace for him.

So he was split into 2 parts, with his better half, the part of him deemed worthy of participating in their culture still somehow managing to be an incredibly inappropriate sex hound, but a largely tolerable one in comparison, especially as he had also been stripped of his ability to bear children or transform humans into slenderbeings entirely, was allowed to remain with the slender culture, while the other, more warmongering half was banished.

Much of his physique and temperament was altered to fit in with the slender-being ideals of male beauty and romance, and would go on to always change along with the slender beings cultural ideal of beauty as time went on, but most often being tall and thin, rather than the more compact, highly muscular, roman/greek ideal of the human male body he used to have, and generally being less bestial in his looks, with less pronounced teeth and claws than he had originally.
In addition, rose’s now represented his primary icon, with him seeming to be able to summon the beautiful flowers at will, something that would remain consistent across both of his parts from then on, essentially as a spiked chain used to keep him in line, stopping him from getting as out of control as he had once been, though it was often romanticized in the culture, rather than regarded as such.

The society quickly added this “New Offender” to the pantheon of “deity’s”, as the brothers were quickly starting to be regarded as, and mostly tried to forget about the few years when offender held power, destroying the buildings and such they had made in that time, and generally abandoning their obsession with roman culture, and instead focusing on the more modern for the time styles in their art and dress, with the greko-roman style never picking up again in their culture like it had for human ones.

Though they did end up keeping one of the traditions from that time period.
The gladiatorial fights, once a pointless brawl for Offender’s amusement, became an important method between members of the royal family’s for determining their rank within the society.

Over time the slender-being civilization came to forget that Offender had ever even been split into multiple parts in the first place, having accepted the new Offender simply as “the prince of roses” and left it at that.
But what happened to the other half? The one that represented the original Offenderman?

Well, he hung around with the endermen for awhile longer, but soon grew bored, and like an ancient dragon, decided on a whim to take a century’s long nap.
Also like an ancient dragon, he grew to massive size in the that time, his sleeping form clocking in at about 60 feet long in the modern day, becoming what looked like a massive masterfully carved marble statue of a muscular, faceless man.

His sleeping form became essentially the cultures worst kept secret. Generally not even being known about for the more legitimized, royalty based culture, who found him distasteful and saw no reason to teach their children about him when they already had a mostly acceptable Offenderman already, but being used frequently by the lower classes and the ancient lineages that chose to exist outside the main slender culture.
In particular, the secret lineage of the slender beings who had been sired by him during his few years of ruling, but had been denied a place of royalty despite being the only ones of the culture who’s direct linage could be traced back to one of the three brothers by birth outside of the ender beings (who mostly just kept to themselves), rather than simply being one of the oldest humans turned slender-being which defined the upper classes of the time.

But there was good reason for this, due to these children generally being incredibly aggressive individuals that did not fit in with the air of class the society generally tried to live by, and their adeptness and ruthlessness in physical combat, as well as overall hardiness, giving them an unfair advantage in the gladiatorial combat, with some of the enduring legend’s about them including such tales as when one of them still managed to murder their opponent in gladiatorial combat despite having been decapitated.  


But back to the sleeping half of Offenderman, despite him being “asleep”, he still held some measure of consciousness, which made him useful in a number of ways.

Primarily, his irresponsible decedents used him as a teacher/babysitter for the kids they couldn’t be bothered to take care of, along with the young orphans of other slender beings they had killed in battle.

Of course in a more respectable sense, they also used him as a vast library of both ancient and modern events, with the highest classes of royalty, or whichever random smuck  who happened to be friends with someone already in the know, coming to ask him questions, often about events that either weren’t recorded, or were not recorded in great enough detail, often involving clarifying unclear lineages, or recalling  stored memories of now dead slender’s and important humans that had been given to him for safe keeping, or stopping by to store these memories themselves,  with  some groups of slender beings making pilgrimages every ten to twenty years or so to dump their memories in him.
Although as to why something so potentially useful would be so often ignored among the main culture of the slender beings?

To put it simply, despite him being asleep, he still manages to be a massive asshole.

When he’s not being deliberately unhelpful or malicious for no reason, he still will generally put greater emphasis on things not generally considered as particularly useful, such as memories of embarrassing, or humorous events experienced by long dead slender’s or humans, not to mention often being a massive time waster, being highly prone to going off on pointless, unrelated tangents.

So as an example, a high class slender being might come to him looking to answer a question about whether or not their ancestor was involved in some event, and then come away with an entire lifetime of memories from an orca whale and a yes-no answer to their question.
He’s driven a great number mad from subjecting them to such things.

So back to his previous task, which is generally regarded as the only thing he seems to be able to do properly with any consistency, is the whole babysitting/daycare/ teaching thing he does.

Basically, you just dump your young slenderbeing in his cave with him, and he’ll teach them the basics, like how to read and write and play an instrument and all your basic life skills along with whatever in particular interests them by basically downloading the information into their heads a little bit each day, generally giving them the slenderbeing equivalent of a high school education in about half the time, while they mess around on top of his huge sleeping form, with some popular games being,  see if you’re strong enough that you can lift his giant hand, tug of war with his tongue, carving your little kid artwork into his flesh like it was a chalkboard, playing a song on his giant teeth like a giant xylophone, and the ever popular, try to flip him all the way over (with rumor having it that he had originally been laying on his back, but that some group of kids centuries ago had managed to flip him over onto his front, where he has remained ever since).
Although this method is hardly without its flaws, and there is a good reason why it is almost exclusively done by the irresponsible parent who can’t be bothered to raise their kids.

Not only does this generally make them unsuited for a life in the main slenderbeing society, there’s also a fair chance that Offender will randomly kill some of them for no good reason.
With the typical excuse’s being that they were either too boring for his taste’s, or too “samey”.
Or in other words, reminded him too much of too many slender beings who’s memories he holds, that he regards the kid as too much of a repeat of its ancestors and not really worth his time.
Although that’s in the rare instances in which he actually does provide an explanation. Most of the time there is no explanation why.

So statistically, out of a group of about 20 kids put through a full education by him, typically between 5-8 of them will be killed by him in that time period, and not necessarily in a “natural selection survival of the fittest” sort of way, with there being many instances in which the weakest of the group making it out alive. It’s basically a crapshoot most of the time.


These slenderbeings, thanks to their unique education, often have a number of calling cards that make the ones who had been taught by him, or are the decedents of those taught by him, stand out a bit.
The most common of these being the use of outdated language, particularly with slang terms and swear words, sometimes to the point of being a unique dialect.
Over time this basically became the slenderbeing equivalent of having a cockney accent, although many that try to integrate themselves into the main slender society adopt a more typical manner of speaking.

They tend to be very skilled in whatever activity interests them, with an immense knowledge base on the subject, as if they had studied it for lifetimes.

They also tend to be schooled in “self defense” in one way or another, which is typically expressed by a varying set of absolutely ruthless dirty tricks that are nowhere near a “fair and honorable fight”.
They also have a tendency to be a bit more “physical” than most slenderbeings, in being more prone to athleticism in their everyday lives, and are often more comfortable with humans and human turned slenders than their more high class counterparts, and are more likely to have human friends and proxies.
They’re also typically more knowledgeable about human culture and entertainment, as that’s one of the topics Offender most freely distributes information about to help keep the kids entertained.  There are even some slender’s who’s duty is to watch movies and cartoons and books and such and relay the information back to Offender so he always has relevant time period specific children’s media to expose to the kids to help prevent them from being too unstuck in time.

There’s also a lingering prophecy of sorts that when Offender wakes up he’s gonna cause untold destruction and basically bring the slenderbeing civilization to its knees, but those who were raised by him, while they agree that’s totally gonna happen, don’t really see it as such a big deal, treating it more like.
Yeah, when de decides to be up and about again he’ll probably want to have some action and go around killing everyone, but you probably don’t have to worry about it much cus he’s pretty lazy and probably can’t be bothered with it until the world starts being an especially dull place, in which case we’ll probably be grateful to have a giant psycho murdering everyone in sight for a few years.

And that’s about it.